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Weight Loss and Control:
Roger Gould, MD's Weekly Blog
on Emotional Eating

Knowledge is power.
Understanding why you turn to food is the key to changing it. Join in the discussion each week as Dr. Gould shares his valuable insights from over 30-years of clinical experience.

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Never Binge Again


Never binging again is possible but the biggest mistake that people who binge make is saying to themselves, "I'll never binge again!" Yet, we all do it. The food is finished and then we promise ourselves that it will never happen again. Even though almost everyone that binges says that to themselves, it sets you up for self-hatred, guilt and failure. You see, no one that ends a pattern of binging does it cold turkey. You don't decide to stop and then never binge again. It's just not how ending a pattern of binging works. That's because the binge serves a very important purpose. It makes you feel better emotionally. So, if you're committed to never binging again what are the signs along the way the signify that you're succeeding:

*More time between binges (even something small for example, I used to binge every other day and now only do it every third day)
*Shorter binges (My binges used to last two days, now they only last an hour)
*Binges on smaller amounts of food (I used to eat a gallon of ice-cream, now I eat half a pint)
*The ability to stop a binge in the middle (I used to not even realize I was having a binge till it was over, now I can stop myself in the middle)
*Forgiving yourself more quickly after a binge ends (I don't talk to myself in a mean way when I binge, I have compassion for myself)
*Bouncing back more quickly when a binge happens (in other words recommitting to understanding and stopping your binge pattern)
*Understanding what feelings set off the binge (I was able to see that I had the binge after I had a fight with my boss)
*The ability to see a binge coming (even if you can't stop it yet)

Being able to acknowledge the small successes along the way is a really important step on the road to recovery. It can be all too easy to see how far you still need to go and forget how far you've already come. Ending a binge pattern is hard work but you can do it. One day you might not binge at all but it won't happen by making a declaration, it will happen by being loving to yourself and staying aware. So, don't say, "I'll never binge again." Instead, take it one gentle step at a time. Remember, you're looking for progress, not perfection.

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This is a question that many people that come to our site ask. If 95% of diets fail, what's the answer? Well, the fact is you need three things to lose weight (and keep it off for life):

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The Education You Never Got in School


My eight-year old son went back to school this week. There is hustle and bustle in the neighborhood about which teacher gives the most homework and how different third grade is from second grade. They will learn multiplication tables and how to write in cursive (not sure why they don't give touch typing lessons instead) along with so much new information. It got me thinking about how much time we spend in our lives getting an academic education. I was in school for twenty years, and even now, fifteen years out of university I still frequently take courses when I can. However, there isn't any obligatory, state-funded emotional education to navigate the stressful waters we sail in during our lives. By keeping that in mind perhaps you can forgive yourself when you find yourself reaching for food to deal with stress (or boredom, or anger, or loneliness, or grief, or sadness or any other feeling) instead of having the skills to handle those feelings head-on.

How can we start to give ourselves, and each other, the emotional education we didn't receive in school so we can fulfill ourselves instead of filling ourselves with food?

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